How to Move On by Vanessa Mae Rivera

Rivera, Vanessa Mae D.

BSE ENGLISH 2-1

How to Move On

Have you been on a break up? Been cheated on? Been left behind? Been a rebound? Of course, all of this only applies to those who were in a relationship, but moving on is not exclusive to them. Anyone who’s been hurt, may it be by a friend, a crush or a family member has the right to move on. But before we go on any further, let me define the term ‘moving on’.

For me, moving on is starting over. Not necessarily with the same person or happening. Starting over, meaning to let go of the pain you’re feeling and to stop being affected with what happened. Moving on is not easy. Been there, done that. In contrast to popular beliefs, moving on with life gets harder every time. So here are some tips that should help you with moving on. These are from experience and I hope they would be useful to you.

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Stop all forms of communications. Delete his/her number. Block that person on all social networking sites and REFRAIN from stalking him/her. As ‘bitter’ as this move sounds, it’s effective. It prevents you two from talking again, thus helping you to move on with your life. If the person is your friend, and you are in the same room together, just act casual. Don’t say unnecessary words or do acts that may lead to a fight. There will be awkwardness, expect it, so the least you could do is to avoid a cat fight.

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Flush all the thoughts and the hope of a future with the two of you together, down the drain. It’s hard, I know. After a break-up, relationship or friendship-wise, there is something inside you that hopes for a reconciliation. Don’t be a hypocrite, you hoped for it and you know it! I advise you to just focus on the people surrounding you and not waste your time on someone that turned his/her back on you.

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Delete all his/her pictures on your gadgets. Delete allselfies, groupies, and even the screenshots of your old conversations, because trust me, it will only make your ‘moving on’ harder than it already is. Being reminded of your memories with him/her doesn’t only hold you back from moving on, it also makes you miss that person. And you shouldn’t. You will, but I repeat, you shouldn’t.

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Focus on your current situation. Drown yourself with school projects or paper works, not with liquor. Being drunk will make you forget the pain for a little while, but won’t help you move on.

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Surround yourself with other/new people. No, I’m not saying that you should go into a relationship immediately. Go out, shop, eat, and have fun! Nobody moves on by locking himself/herself on his/her room. Talk to your friends. Tell them how you feel.  They’ll listen, I promise. They’ll lecture you about being a drama queen, but nevertheless, they’ll be there to make you feel that you’re not alone, that there are still people in the world that loves you and is there for you.

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Get a haircut. I’ve seen it in the movies, and tried it a few times, I swear it’s effective. Getting your hair done releases frustration, at least for me it does. Plus, having a new look is a bonus.

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Stop listening to the songs that remind you of him/her.Delete your friendship song on your playlist. Delete the song he/she sang or played or you during your anniversary. Delete any song that makes you remember him/her. Stop trying to remember things, it’s never gonna happen again. It’s over, deal with it.

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Cry your eyes out and when you’re finally tired, let go. Cry. Cry and cry and cry until no more tears come out of your eyes. Tire yourself out. Release the pain you’re feeling. It’s not bad to feel sad for a couple of days, or weeks, or maybe even months, or years for other people, just make sure to pick yourself up when you can’t feel the pain anymore.

At the end of the day, everything still depends upon you. There may be chances of reconciliation and apologies said, but please, if you feel that the person no longer deserves you, don’t give him another chance. However, if you feel it in your heart that he/she deserves another chance, then give it. Just be a little more careful this time, okay? There’s no harm in trying again, but don’t force things. What’s meant to be will happen anyway.